Health Issues Make Me Feel Worn

Health issues have made me feel worn, tattered and questioning if my life will not go on more than in the “short term”, whatever that may be.

This really began when I started getting short-of-breath late in 2016.  I thought at first that I was having an extreme reaction to a bad cold.   It was disconcerting to suddenly change from being in excellent physical shape to having trouble walking and exercising.   In early 2017 we went to NYC.   While there I repeatedly struggled walking a few blocks.   This experience made me realize that something might be seriously wrong with me.

Finally, I went to my doctor.  I was shocked when she told me she thought I had a heart condition. She referred me to a cardiologist.   I did horribly on a stress test.   I then had an angiogram.  The cardiologist  tried unsuccessfully to insert a stent in an artery that was close to 100% blocked.   I was really scared and discouraged!

My cardiologist referred me to another cardiologist he thought might be able to help me.   The specialist told me that he was 90% certain he could successfully insert a stent in my artery which would end me being short of breath.

Thankfully, I subsequently had a successful insertion of two stents in the blocked artery.  It was a pleasure then to no longer get out-of-breath going up the few steps into our house.  It was wonderful when exercising to feel like I was 80% of my peak self, rather than 20%.   I was very thankful that walking our dog no longer was a struggle.

In April, 2018 I started having problems with constipation.  At first it didn’t seem too bad. 

Gradually – it got significantly worse.   It is a horrible feeling to struggle to get more and more out of me, but never to feel like I’m free (of needing to go more).    Going to the bathroom 10-15 times/day was really tough and often very painful.

After medical treatment with three gastroenterologists, and some painful intervention, I’m cautiously hopeful that a few months of physical therapy may help my body take care of this issue.   It keeps me up some nights and early mornings.   It is generally tolerable and far better than it was at its worst.

A nagging problem that started in the muscle area of my lower right leg has also been painful and troubling.   An MRI – disclosed a strain – which IF it was my problem has resolved.  Then a faintly similar problem developed in the muscle area of my upper right leg.    Currently, I have physical therapy.   Sometimes it seems like it is helping.   Increasingly, I’m wondering if the strain is/was secondary to some other problem – with blood vessels? – or something else – I’ve no clue what it may be.

In a few days if things don’t improve noticeably, I’m going to  strongly seek an MRI of the upper right leg.  The spasm like feelings in the leg – tell me any strain is secondary to something more serious, though I don’t know what could be wrong.

Not being able to walk comfortably – though I can do it better than a few weeks ago – feels horrible.  It seems symbolic of getting older –being  infirm.  I’m used to walking and walking – and finding it easy and comfortable.

After multiple high readings, my doctor asked me to take my blood pressure regularly.   Because of the results she put me on blood pressure medication.   After the blood pressure readings remained high, she agreed with my thoughts and doubled my dosage.   

My blood pressure seems to remain high.  It feels like the leg condition and the constipation raise my blood pressure.

My doctor has already told me that I am at a high risk for a major stroke in the coming years.  Getting my blood pressure down is important in cutting my vulnerability in this area.

I feel like I’m a mess physically!  I am very, very thankful  - that I am otherwise very much enjoying my life.   

All of this – indirectly brings me back to thinking of my erectile dysfunction.   It first became an issue - back in 1998.   Now 20 years later – I’m significantly affected by it.   You can read more this in my 2013 writing:   

Living and Loving With Erectile Dysfunction .  (hyperlink)

I try to be positive!   It isn’t easy.

Thanks!