Pain, Trauma, Fear and Curiosity

 Pain, Trauma, Fear and Curiosity

Can Mingle

Together

Or Not

Particularly

When one is

Overwhelmed

By the intensity

Of what space

One is In

--

I try

To remain curious

And

Do a pretty good job

When not stuck

In my own Terrors

Or the rabbit holes

Of my distant past

--

I can’t understand

I can’t know

Not Being

in the Other’s Shoes

I Can Listen

I Can Hear

but

What Can I Really Hear?

How Trapped?

How Trapped am I,

In my stories of

my past

Are These Stories

Really Deeply Imbedded

in the Generations

of My Ancestors

My Childhood Shaped Me

Deeply

As I try to Pull

Layer after Layer

Off

There are always

More Layers

More Layers to try

to Uncover

--

I Am Lucky

that an Important Part

of Me

Can Remain

using the Vestiges

the Depth

of My Privilege

and the Learnings

the Growth

That

Often Evolve

Primarily Out

of the Depths

of It

--

The Privilege

Can Shield Me

But

Thankfully it Doesn’t

Enough of the Time

that I can See

Outside the Box

That Surrounds Me

 

 

 

 

 

                               

--

Curiosity

Is One Benefit

I Have Today

Pushing Outward

Ever Increasingly

Opening Up

Little Cracks

that Can lead

to More and More Cracks

-       I Know

-       That I Know

Very Little – Less Apparently

Or it appears so

The More I Know

The More I Know

How Little I Know

Curiosity

Curiosity

--

Another Side

I See

Is Trauma Induced Fear

Beyond

Beyond Me

The Pain

Is So,

So Deep

Within

That – the Trauma’s

Depths of Pain

Frequently

Immerse

Them

In Fear

Where Curiosity

is Lost

--

I Try

Others Try

Moving Along

Their Paths

Some – Intersection

of Some

with Parts

of Me

My Chance(s)

are Out There

--

I Am Out There

I Am In Here

Do I Know?

No, it is a Pathway

A Pathway – through

The Curves of the River

Increasing its Momentum

Sometimes, Slowed

by the Mud

That Slows Me

--

It is My Path

It is Not Yours

Your Path

I try to Follow

Learn From

Your Beauty

Your Wisdom

Experience

Some of Your Pain

Not Understanding

But Trying

--

I Am

I Be

I Will

So ….

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