I am Trying to do Better

I am trying to do better

but

Often

it Doesn't seem to Matter

Better

is subjective

What really is it?

Getting older

is often physically painful

Emotionally

Growth is usually Challenging

I was stuck in a hornet's nest

for too many years

Failing to be accountable

to myself or to others

Doing some good

wasn't good enough

I seemingly can not

fend off

a swarming bee

Carrying anger, fear and

much more

I will not take the sting

while feeling a lot 

of the venom

Change isn't easy

but

Its essence - its depth

is positive

when one moves

outside

of the gopher hole

into an invigorating maelstrom

of Fascinating worlds

it is often stormy

with the tides

both in and out.

I am Trying to do Better

My success or not

is to be Determined.